Shabbat Inspiration with Diane

  I woke up this morning and per usual, I looked out my window and began my time with God. As I write this, I’ve never seen such a beautiful combination of clouds. The sky is a light blue with small clouds grayish on the underside and fluffy white on top, suggestive of the imperfect world below them covered by the illuminated heavenly world above. The fluffy white parts of the clouds are almost glowing as they unrestrictedly bask in the warm glow of the brilliance of what shines above them. I can’t see the heavens but I surely can feel them. . .   In the forefront I also see a utility pole with a transformer and the calm ocean as a backdrop. Years ago in a Shabbat... Read More →

  We all have tsuris (worry). This past month we’ve been focused on my personal trauma of the uncertainty of the possible death of my adult daughter. By many of your responses, these thoughts have resonated with you as well, in your cases relatable to dark times even if not as horrific as mine at the moment. As of this writing the DNA comparison result is still not known by me.   Mine is a bizarre scenario that most of you will never experience and I thank God for that! A parent outliving his or her child goes against all acceptable realities. Living in the uncertainty of that determination is additional torture.   I’m reading When We See You Again by Rachel... Read More →

  Last week we noodled what it means to fight the good fight – fighting to love, especially when to do so is not easy, even to love our enemies. We also faced the reality that loving the unlovable is seemingly beyond our human capabilities, and yet, striving to do so brings us that much closer to the created beings we were formed to be. Even when we fall short, our trying brings love into this world and into the lives of those we touch, those who sometimes before then never have felt such caring.   What a springboard for discussion as this Friday we experience Dolly Parton Day! Of course her musical talent was unique, but her giving heart was incomparable. Her life... Read More →

Last week, two days before 9/11 was the 25th anniversary of my coming to know that Yeshua is the Messiah. He transformed my life that day and each day since then. Over these many years I’ve learned more about His Truth as He continues to be part of my daily thoughts, prayers, and actions.   In 2001, two days after my literal epiphany when the horror of 9/11 unfolded, and until recently, I had mused that perhaps God had “zapped” a multitude of people around the world at that same time to believe in Yeshua, as He did me, an unsuspecting, unlikely candidate to be called into His service. With the way the world looked back then it seemed that perhaps in those seemingly horrific days... Read More →

A week before my meeting with the detective about the Jane Doe that may be my daughter AnnaLisa my sister Wendy showed me the trailer for Season 6 of The Chosen. During the intense scene between Mary and Yeshua before His crucifixion, as I watched, I had stabbing pain in my belly which remained for hours afterward. I told Wendy that although I’m an avid fan of the series I wasn’t sure I could actually watch Season 6 when it is released.   Fast forward to the day of my meeting with the detective, and every day since then, these days of unimaginable grief, now sprinkled with times of the ability to be with others and even laugh, though the moments with just my thoughts often bring me... Read More →

  It’s been such a hard time. As you know from last week, we are fairly convinced the Jane Doe Sid and I discussed last week with the Billerica detective is, in fact, my daughter AnnaLisa. The depth of grieving has been indescribable. I am so grateful for the kindnesses extended to me during these dreadful days of waiting.   Just as the horrific has been prevalent, so too has the holy.   Monday was the birthday of the Baal Shem Tov. You may rightly ask, “So what?”. That’s how amazing God is. My family through my mother are his descendants, or so we’ve been told through genealogy researchers. As God in His perfect timing always does, my sister sent me a post from Facebook... Read More →

  Last week I shared with you a recent contact from a detective regarding my daughter who had left for LA in 2020. Sid and I met with the detective this week, and although not conclusive, as of this writing it is more likely than not that she has gone to be with our Creator.   You know last week I was not prepared for this outcome so I am in a very different place this week emotionally than I was then. The purpose of this message is not to dwell in my inner world of grief and the processing that is just starting, but rather, to share with you thoughts about my daughter and the impact her journey has made on me, and those who knew her, in hopes that doing so will give you a new... Read More →

As you know my life already is filled with travel, for that is the journey when one has so many loved ones that are part of our life. This summer, however, has been extreme even for me, for on the heels of the UMJC conference in NC, I was blessed with a beloved nephew’s wedding in VT immediately followed by two weeks in PA with Camp Or L’Dor with just a day between its end and more travel to our daughter’s wedding in Wisconsin. On even that day Sid and I made a one day drive to and from ME for an emergency medical appointment!   When I was still at the Milwaukee airport waiting for Sid’s wheelchair (yes, more challenges), I received an extremely disturbing phone call.   Some... Read More →

  On Wednesday evening Sid and I watched the Perseids meteor shower. This particular display is one which comes with a great deal of anticipation each year for it can be spectacular to watch in our area. I have to admit I’ve never paid much attention to it for its “peak” display typically occurs in the middle of the night or predawn and I prioritize a good night’s sleep. That was true until this year.   Friends of ours were encouraging us to give it a try, especially since the display was to start at 10 PM (though predicted to be magnificent between 2 and 4 AM) and the moon was new so it would be an exceptionally dark sky. As last evening wore on and I wasn’t too sleepy at 10... Read More →

  Camp this year was the best year yet. This is the consensus of the campers and our new ones, as well as our repeat campers, are already excited to return next year. The experiences sometimes are rough, but that’s how we grow, for it is at those times that we sense His nearness.   This year’s camp experience was transformative for me as well. It being our chai year, the eighteenth summer of this initiative, I was prompted to reflect on our mission as well as more broadly, how each of us can serve His Kingdom most effectively.   It probably was not a coincidence that the very day after camp ended one of the projects I had worked on for Our Daily Bread (ODB) Ministries was... Read More →

  Camp has been so wonderful this year. In large part it is due to the chemistry of the campers, not to mention, of course, the dedicated hours of our volunteers and staff. Although that service by so many is a constant year-to-year, what has made this year especially remarkable has been the lack of cliques and drama among the campers, much less than in some of our prior years, for some is to be expected. We also were blessed with so many campers who have been with us before that the group has “jelled” beautifully.   We did have weather challenges on the OA (overnight adventure) days of camp which involve offsite canoeing and hiking and so we brought our groups back early as a... Read More →

  It is another stunningly beautiful day in the Poconos. It’s not just any day. It’s Shabbat. It’s not just any Shabbat. It’s Shabbat at Camp Or L’Dor, and it’s our chai year, the 18th time this blessing has been bestowed on us.   Most of you know a summer camp for Messianic Jewish teens was just a dream of Sid’s for decades until Rabbi Nathan came to Ruach Israel when the two teamed up to make that dream a reality. Literally blood, sweat, and tears with perseverance by so many dedicated volunteers and staff have molded Camp Or L’Dor’s formation and blossoming. Yet there has been one constant since day one – the campers.   I have never forgotten a comment made by Rabbi... Read More →

  Personally I believe angels are all around us. I believe the veil between the seen and unseen worlds is permeable and we just can’t see into it. My sense is the spiritual beings in the unseen realm can and do interact with this realm.   I have experienced angels in my life, ones I consider real angels. I have heard stories from credible sources who have experienced an angel in the guise of a person. One such trusted person shared with me her being saved from a near deadly accident when she was in Israel. While crossing the street she stepped right in front of an oncoming bus and was pushed out of its way by a “person” at the last moment so she was not killed. When she looked... Read More →

  Sid and I recently participated in the dedication ceremony for a bronze sculpture made by William Zorach, a Jewish immigrant born in Lithuania in the late 1880s.  Our local Maine band provided music as part of the program which included the benefactors who made the sculpture possible financially as well as historians and local notables connected with the City of Bath and the Patten Free Library where this magnificent artwork graces its grounds.   As I listened to the speeches of the various groups involved, in particular, those sharing the decades of history behind the gift, the prevalence of Jewish influence in the narrative was overwhelming. This reaction was not just... Read More →

  I am so grateful to be home . . . at least for even a few days.   We have been on the road more than usual and our usual is already a lot. This morning was the first day in a long time when Sid and I could awake to a quiet morning and enjoy the beauty of our surroundings. I never get tired of just looking out the window and breathing in the majesty of His created world.   As many of you know we live in a fishing village in rural Maine. Our view is where the Kennebec River meets Casco Bay. In sight is our cove as well as a nearby island so there is always glorious flying and swimming wildlife to amuse us. Eagles are especially prevalent and fly from the cove to the... Read More →

  This has been the most delightful two weeks of my most recent life. You know from my wanderings that my flight back from Dallas to Boston on Memorial Day “somehow” diverted me to Denver where my son’s family including our adorable granddaughter live. We had a delightful time there. That Friday I flew back to Boston with her and since then we’ve been together on Gramzy adventures for the past ten days. The expression “I feel in seventh heaven” resonates regardless of the merit of the allusion!   Two Shabbats at Ruach were over the top wonderful in all ways, not to mention glamping trips each weekend after services and oneg as we traveled in our RV to be with our other son’s... Read More →

  Last week we pondered how our emotional wiring starting from childhood frames our life perspective. In situations where we have experienced hardship and trauma from a young age, in perception or reality, our lives can be stuck in negative cycles that can not only distort our realities, but also, rob joy from our lives.   In addition to actual pain we’ve experienced affecting our perspectives, we can also fall victim to misunderstanding what really happened. With that trap and all the pitfalls of life at work, not to mention evil influences, it’s a wonder we can feel positive at all! That thought gave me pause, for it must be some amazing force of good and light, that is, God... Read More →

  I suppose it sounds corny – “God is love”.  We’ve heard the phrase so many times. It sends a beautiful direct and subliminal message making us feel comforted just in seeing the words and bringing them to our consciousness. What this week’s experiences have shown me, reminded me of, is the immense power of that love.   I really have not landed home from Florida yet. I’ve been back, to the Shabbaton, to services, and a brief unload of packed belongings to my home. On the heels of that trip, however, I flew to NYC for work and then to Dallas to be with my sister on her big birthday.   In the Dallas airport Monday afternoon, as I was looking forward to returning home (or to... Read More →

  Spoiler Alert: Do not read this Shabbat encouragement unless you have already seen or do not plan to watch the movie “Remarkably Bright Creatures” on Netflix starring Sally Field and Lewis Pullman (as well as Marcellus the octopus). The big reveal occurs in the last ten minutes of the movie so if you do watch it I encourage you to be patient, for the movie moves a bit slowly.   Why am I writing a movie review as this week’s encouragement? Because it is encouraging.   The narrative follows two ordinary people but is told through the eyes of a not so ordinary narrator, an omniscient octopus named Marcellus. We enter his thoughts as he discusses his observations of the... Read More →

  Last week we pondered this time of reset – an opportunity to slow down, reset our priorities, and move forward with intention, specifically with God at the helm. Then I was focusing on just having returned from our wintering in Florida. I was looking forward to literally this next season of rebirth internally and was reminded of its exquisite timing as I observed nature’s glorious rebirths of spring.   So of course the Ruach Shabbaton was perfectly timed. What a shift to go from full on, even beyond normal busy because of travel and moving, to the peace of last weekend. I must profusely thank those Ruachites who made this possible and I pray they will have similar... Read More →

  I love my sister’s house.   Sid and I arrived late Monday night from our sojourn in Florida. In some ways it seems like we’ve been gone for a long time. In other ways it’s as if I never left, for my heart is always here even when away.   One of my favorite rooms is her “cabin room”, a delightful second floor wooden room warmed in the winter with a wood stove at its center with full view of the backyard trees through wall to wall windows. It’s as if I’m in a forest with a literal bird’s eye view.   This morning as I sat there with my morning coffee I was so at peace, feeling God’s Presence. It had been awhile since I had felt that peaceful intimacy, for the last... Read More →

  While in Florida for the past several years I’ve enjoyed being part of “The Jam”. This is a group of singers and musicians made up of some of us who live here. On Thursday afternoons we perform for other residents who bring their lawn chairs to listen and relax by the local canal. Looking back I think the jam has been a training ground for me to become more confident in my singing since for my first 50 years I was a musician (pianist and clarinetist).   For the past couple years I have not been as drawn to participate but if I do I’ve wanted to only sing spiritually uplifting songs. The group loves oldies so I’ve focused on ones like “Turn, Turn, Turn” , “If I Had a Hammer”,... Read More →

  Last week we noodled the importance of bringing more love into this world in order to combat the dark forces of evil. I was still kvelling (rejoicing) in the warmth of love still aglow from our granddaughter’s visit and thanking God for all the blessings He made possible.     Yet I know there are times when we’re just not feelin’ it, especially when so much seems to be going wrong, personally or societally. To some my life sounds euphoric while theirs feels more like Job’s! Trust me I have had and probably will have again my share of tsuris (troubles)!     Sometimes joy in the Lord seems made for others, not for us. Yet we all... Read More →

  Last week I shared with you the joy and peace that I was experiencing as a result of the visit by our 7 year old granddaughter. Now after days of Disneyworld, camping in our RV, travel to a five year old grandson’s birthday party in St. Petersburg, more beach and swim days, and travel home,  I can only say I’m not the least bit tired. Rather, I am renewed and refreshed. That is not of human capacity. That is of the Lord.        I honestly feel that the power of love is so strong that it really can overcome inexplicable challenges and even darkness. It is that latter aspect that has intrigued me, especially this week.        What is going on in the world???!!!! It only gets crazier.... Read More →

  The past weeks have been filled with goodness and yet I have been challenged with more responsibilities than usual. Primarily my efforts have been focused on nursing Sid back to health and Baruch Hashem he is now pain free as his ankle continues to heal. We are praying that the x-rays next week show the anticipated progress to allow weight bearing.      Months ago a visit by our 7 year old granddaughter had been planned. This was to be particularly special since she lives in Denver and was going to be here without her parents for 10 days!! Gramzy’s heart was singing with just the thought! Needless to say as the planned date came closer, given Sid’s accident, many conflicting thoughts... Read More →